Well,today is Hugh’s 51st birthday. I know he’s back in LA ,there are a few pics from the airport and shooting is scheduled to begin on Monday .
He doesn’t need my wishes,they probably mean nothing to him(never mind the fact that he’ll never know I exist) but I’ll wish him a Happy Birthday and lots of health(cause the rest he has already). If he is half the kind of man he appears to be or used to be then he deserves all the best in the world.
You can see pics from the airport at the end of this post ,as always.
If you have a heart please read this next bit too
Now,I know people hate stuff like this but I gotta’ try it. I’m severely depressed(yes,I know,so is everyone else,boo-hoo) ,I’m only 22 yro, a smart(I didn’t say it), decent human being who really hasn’t hurt anyone ever. Right now my life is a mess(boo-hoo ,so is everyone elses,yes,again,I know) , I’m emotionally in the gutter and lack any sort of hope of ever getting what I need right now to be even remotely happy. I’ve lost the ability to be, I might have even ruined my future cause of my state(can barely manage to gather will and strength to get out of bed and put on a generic face so my mother doesn’t realize I’m in this state in the little time we spend together at lunch or breakfast. I’ve lost hope and faith in myself and others and that might mean nothing to everyone but everything to me. I go to therapy every week ,been going for a year now but it’s not helping, nothing and no one helps raise my spirits or at least get some sort of needs and desires fulfilled(mind u , I don’t dream of world domination,it’s small stuff),nothing works and I am ashamed to say I’m torn between the desire to live and the need for relief from this emotional pain ,need for relief that makes me slightly suicidal .
I want to at least make one dream come true, I want to meet Hugh,really meet him,talk to him. Yeah,I know there are tons of other people out there wanting the same thing but for me this could be a life saver. It’s stupid maybe to say that people you’ve never met helped shape your life and mean something to you but he’s been in my life in some way for a long time and since I am a young individual that means a lot cause you develop when you’re young and Hugh was part of that, I think I am a little smarter, a little better because I look up to him, I’ve spent a lot of time and even money to honor him in the only way I can, buying stuff and talking about him online or offline. If there’s anyone out there,reading this blog ,maybe even a rep. of his, I would really appreciate it if u could help me,give me some ideas,facilitate something. I can travel but I have to have some plan,it has to be something worth spending money I don’t have . I’m not a stalker or anything. Oh and I tried letters but I doubt anyone ever read them and if they did I probably got laughed at or something cause there was no reply.